I was scared to wake up this morning. Unlike every other day, today is the day that motherhood is celebrated. Today you will open your eyes and sort through the feelings of the little ones you’ve lost, being unable to conceive, the feelings of inadequacy. I want you to know, my love, it is okay to feel.
Here is what I know, it takes strength to make it to church today. It takes God’s strength to smile as all the mother’s are gifted with roses. It takes God’s grace during your weakest hour to hear, “Happy Mother’s Day!” to all your beautiful friends and family and not break. I know how much you hurt and I want you know, it is okay to feel.
I know that this journey is tough. Some days you can hold a little one and smile at the wonders of the life of a child. Other days just holding a little one’s hand gives you the ache of your loss. I know that during baby showers your longing is quadrupled. I know that watching a little one stare at their mama in adoration at the grocery store stirs your heart. But, my love, don’t give up. Don’t give in. God knows the desires of your heart. It is okay to feel.
If there is one thing I have learned through this journey to become a mother it is this: God’s grace is sufficient for me. I yelled. I kicked. I screamed. I hated. I became angry. I was jealous. I was stubborn. You name it I was. I had turned my back on God and blamed Him for making me the way I am. And through it all God stood next to me, holding me, rocking me, loving me. I was worthless, unloveable. But to Him, I was worth it, loved and adored. It is because of Him that I know even though I cannot hold my babies, I am a mother. And it is okay to feel.
I wanted to encourage you today Angel, Mama. I wanted to encourage you to feel. And then, encourage you to love and be loved. Today is about you, too. Celebrate you. Celebrate how you are still standing. How you can take a breath. How you can wake up. I know that some days are harder than others. Oh, but my love, look at you persevere. You are stronger than you think. God is with you. Don’t give up.
With all my love to you. xoxo
My prayer for you..
Lord, you know the struggles. You know the sadness we feel. The hurt. The pain. The inadequacies. I pray that today and every day that You give us strength to get through our toughest and darkest days. Father God, help us to love the mothers today and give us the joy to celebrate with them. Fill our cups with courage and boldness to celebrate others and ourselves this Mother’s Day. Continue to guide us today, strengthen our hearts, minds, body and spirit. You know the emptiness we feel in our hearts, Lord. And today, I ask that You fill that emptiness with unspeakable joy. I pray that we may feel You, God and that we may not turn our backs to You. Lord, heal the brokenness within us. I pray that You touch the wombs of Your daughters. I pray for healing from PCOS, endometriosis, unknown infertility. I pray that the cysts be removed, her ovaries healed, her fallopian tubes opened. But, most importantly, God, I pray that Your will be done in our lives. You have put this longing to parent in our hearts, Lord. And I know, as we continue to love and trust You that You will fulfill the desires of our hearts. Thank you, Lord. I ask for peace and comfort today and always. Touch these woman and bring healing to their hearts. In Jesus name. Amen.