A Lettered Update

Hi Jax,

Can you believe it? It’s been three years since we said goodbye. Sometimes, especially right now as I fight to be a mama, it feels like it was just yesterday.

The talk right now is all about transparency and I think about you. Mainly because I was transparent in regards to my grief from losing you and suddenly it feels like I’m being penalized for it. I was transparent that I hurt. Continue reading “A Lettered Update”

Worth It All

I am blessed to be reminded how many people who are fighting and praying for Jeremy and I during this journey. Life can be so unpredictable and knowing that we have family and friends standing in agreeance with us, for us, has allowed us to stand faithful in the fact that our God is greater than any bad report or action through this journey.

Yesterday, I was filled with a lot of emotions.  Continue reading “Worth It All”

A Broken Update

I keep having these dreams of a house full of children. There is nothing more my heart wants, so why is it so difficult?

Here is my update for the week. And try as I am, I don’t know how this update will look or sound. I don’t plan to edit anything or reread what is written. I don’t know if it is a bad thing or not but all I have for you is pure, raw emotions. I don’t have the energy for anything more. My insides are a bumbled mess and I need to wade through the waters to get back to shore. Continue reading “A Broken Update”

Diary of an Impatient

July 1, 2017

We are headed to camp. I wanted to bring a little one with me but we are still waiting. I remember the days going on camping trips with my parents. My dad would teach us how to fish. We would pop fireworks in manini’s. Ya, my siblings and are were pretty evil. I remember once being on the other side of the island, camping and enjoying the beach. Then seeing the rain usher itself in from sea. One of the most beautiful things you can see. I would love to share that with my little one. Dammit DSHS, come on! Continue reading “Diary of an Impatient”

Not Much To Update

Patience is a virtue. For me it definitely is. There isn’t much of an update this week. Our licensor is still on vacation. I swear July 5th can’t come fast enough. I’m actually going crazy because the world is still buzzing, moving forward, and all I want it to do is stop until things are taken care of.

Once I hear something believe me y’all will be the first to know. When he comes back and says, Pearl and Jeremy let’s fill your home, I will be shouting it from the rooftops. Continue reading “Not Much To Update”

Tick Tocking

Did you know I once wanted to be a preschool teacher? I got out of high school and that wasn’t the only thing I wanted to do. I don’t think I even spent an actual full year before I told myself teaching wasn’t for me. So I majored in something else.

Nearly half a life time later I’ve found myself volunteering to teach preschoolers and wanting to foster to adopt toddlers. Maybe that has always been my calling after all? Continue reading “Tick Tocking”

Beyond Thorough

I am great at creating the worst possible scenarios in my head. I think a lot of times it just really has to do with the need in planning for all possible solutions and outcomes. Today though, today I didn’t plan.

I had gotten into work ready to get the day over with. I walked into work with slippers (flip flops to those not from the islands) because I was too busy ensuring my pups were taken care of. Strike one. Continue reading “Beyond Thorough”

Dear Nana

Dear Nana,

You were gone before I got the pleasure of meeting you. Lately I’ve been thinking about you and Gramps along with my dad and grandparents. But, mostly you.

First, let me take the time to actually introduce myself. I’m the one that “stole” your grandson’s heart. I didn’t mean to at first. Continue reading “Dear Nana”

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